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Saturday, August 13, 2016

Dead Duck

A woman brought a very limp duck to a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, “I’m sorry, Ma’am, but your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.”

The distressed woman wailed, “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead,” replied the vet.
“How can you be so sure?” she protested. “I mean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.”



The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador retriever. As the duck’s owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.  He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.

A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100 percent certifiably, a dead duck.”

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.

The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “$550!” she cried, “$550 just to tell me my duck is dead?

The vet shrugged, “I’m sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $50, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it’s now $550.”

Until Next Time
(today's pics from the internet)

9 comments:

  1. {{{giggling}}} good one, Mary. smiles---Have a beautiful day.

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  2. Thanks for the giggles this morning, Mary! Have a blessed Saturday!

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  3. Oh Mary, that was funny! Thanks for a chuckle.

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  4. Hilarious joke - and I too am dubious of those two identical comments- you may decide to delete them, and I wouldn't blame you one bit.

    Have a blessed day - thanks for the chuckles. : - )

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    1. Thanks Michele, taking your advice and deleted that weird message. It's been bothering me...glad you gave me the little push I needed. Hope you have a blessed day too.

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  5. This truly was medicine for the merry heart! I must try and remember this one to pass on. :)

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  6. Hilarious! I truly needed that today.

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  7. Oh, my word .....wish I'd read this first thing this morning! 😂

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